


I do care

by youmustbestiles



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Drama, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-11
Updated: 2014-03-11
Packaged: 2018-01-15 10:05:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1300963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youmustbestiles/pseuds/youmustbestiles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles got a letter from Derek after he left Beacon Hills...</p>
            </blockquote>





	I do care

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you enjoyed it :)
> 
> Thanks to my lovely beta: http://vakaria.tumblr.com/

Dear Stiles,  
I’m sure you’ll be surprised to see this letter. But I had to write it, I couldn’t leave Beacon Hills without a word. I couldn’t abandon you but I had no courage to say goodbye in person. I know you’ve probably just thought „what a faint-hearted sourwolf” but I hope you understand. After all, you always do.  
Firstly, let me explain all of it. I’ve decided to leave about a month ago. After all those things we’ve been through, I need a break. I'm renting a flat now , reading a few books and thinking about everything. I really need this and I’m sure it’ll be good for everyone. Especially us. I’m aware that I’m terrible at relationships, as you perfectly know. But I feel like it’s a good moment to tell you that I do care about you. I saw your face when you found out about my decision. I heard your heartbeat and I felt your anxiety. I’m sorry for that. I didn’t want to make you feel that way, but it was necessary. You aren’t just an acquaintance because of Scott, not anymore. You’ve became one of the most important people in this supernatural world. I’ve realised that we’re on the same wavelength but we’re so stubborn and silly and we’re quarrelled all the time. I was denying all my thoughts and hidden signals from you for too long. I don’t know what it is but I feel like you have to know. This whole thing is pathetic, hell I am pathetic right now but you know what? I don’t care. I’ve lost so many people I cared about in my life that I’ve understood the importance of feelings for people. I wish I could change, I don’t want to be too cautious anymore. But I guess I need some time to learn that.  
I really do hope that you know what I want to say with this letter. I don’t know if I’m going to come back. And above all, if it’s a smart idea to send you this. I’m sorry for everything, Stiles. I am. Please forgive me and take care of Scott. He needs you now more than ever, now that he took over the responsibilities of protecting Beacon Hills.  
And the most important thing – take care of yourself. Be careful, don’t get involved in something dangerous. Stay safe, Stiles. I wish you all the best from the very bottom of my heart.  
Yours,  
Derek

Stiles read the letter twice and he still couldn’t believe it. Derek had some feelings towards him. There was that invisible, but still undeniable bond between them and he could utterly feel it. But what now? He felt the anger taking him over. „How could he do that? He wrote the fucking letter and he doesn’t even know if we’re going to see each other again. Oh, yes, we are. „ Stiles glanced at the big clock on the wall. It was just half past noon so he grabbed his car keys and wallet, shoved the letter into his pocket and left the house. His jeep seemed to be exausted but Stiles didn’t care. He looked again at the envelope and Derek’s new adress. „It can’t be like that. This way or another. I’m not going to wait my whole life for him. Or maybe I actually would? No, Stiles, no. You’re going to talk to him and tell him what you think.” He spend the whole time on that nervous monologue. He felt completely terrified, he even stuttered talking to himself. With the rest of his courage, he knocked at the door which opened after a while and he saw the cutest view he’d ever seen in his life. Derek was standing there half asleep, his hair sticking out and those hazy eyes…  
„Stiles?! How…What are you doing here?” Derek’s eyes opened wide as well as his mouth.  
„Are you serious? You send me that letter and you’re asking now?” Stiles was irritated and wanted nothing more than to scold him.  
„Come in.”  
Derek invited him in and motioned towards the couch.  
„Why are you here, Stiles? I’m sorry, I souldn’t have sent you that letter…”  
„Shut up,” interrupted Stiles sharply. „I just don’t get how could you write those things after you left? What the hell were you thinking? I care about you too!” By the end of the sentence Stiles was shouting.  
Derek looked totally confused. Like he was struggling with himself, with his own mind and heart. He hesitated but then looked straight into Stiles’ eyes. He knew it was the only way to find out his feelings. And when he did that, Stiles stopped talking and sighed. His eyes brimming with tears sunk into Derek’s.  
„I think you should go.” Derek said suddenly and it felt like being slapped.  
Derek was convincing himself that it’d be better for Stiles to live without him. His heart was breaking but he knew it was the right thing to do. He had to do it.  
„Go. Just go!”  
Stiles blinked in shock and ran out of the flat. Tears were streaming down his face, blurring his vision so he could barely see where he was going. „You’re so stupid Stiles. He didn’t write that he loves you, he just cares, like others do. You’re so naive.” He hid his face in his palms and felt so empty. Like his will of life just went away. He was about to start the engine when the door opened. Derek was standing there with the most painful expression on his face Stiles had ever seen. It only took him a moment to realize Derek wanted to protect him from himself. He was too cautious again. Stiles wanted to say something but Derek leaned in and kissed him with all his passion. The kiss was so soft and full of love and fear at the same time. Stiles pulled the man closer and forgot about the world around them. It was the most beautiful moment in his life. They both felt like they were thirsty and they finally got some water to drink. It felt so right and somehow unbelievable.  
„Stay,” Derek murmured between kisses as they heard the song on the radio:  
„My whole life  
Waiting for the right time  
To tell you how I feel  
And though I tried to  
Tell you that I need you  
Here I am without you  
I feel so lost, but what can I do?  
‘Cause I know this love seems real  
But I don’t know how to feel…  
We say goodbye in the pouring rain  
And I break down as you walk away (Stay! Stay!)  
‘Cause all my life I felt this way  
But I could never find the words to say (Stay! Stay!)  
Alright, everything is alright  
Since you came along  
And before you  
I had nowhere to run to  
And nothing to hold on to  
I came so close to giving it up  
And I wonder if you know  
How it feels to let you go?  
We say goodbye in the pouring rain  
And I break down as you walk away (Stay! Stay!)  
‘Cause all my life I felt this way  
But I could never find the words to say (Stay! Stay!)  
So you change your mind and say you’re mine  
Don’t leave tonight  
Stay…”.


End file.
